Early Morning
by gracefacex
Summary: Kurt remembers the past. Slash/Au.
1. Thoughts

**I do not own Glee.**

Pale blue sky mornings and a cup of tea.  
It's a morning walk ritual, a time to think about the past, a time that nobody can interrupt.  
So much has changed.  
No more Marc Jacobs outerwear or Louis Vuitton clutches.  
Just pure, natural Kurt.  
So much has changed.

Your eyes open wider when you meet your soul mate. It doesn't matter who they are, what they've done, who they've done it with. All that matters, honestly, is that they exist. Soul mates are never meant to have perfect relationships. Love will hurt you, scar you, and make you have regrets. Love is not kind; love is violent; but violent in such tender, beautiful ways.

He fucked girls to prove he was straight.  
I made myself up to show I was gay.  
We were both fake, we were both liars, we never saw anything coming.

It happened the day he slapped me. The day he looked into my eyes and told me he could see through the act I put on. The show that was Kurt Hummel. That collision, his skin touching mine, it relaxed. His hand stayed placed on my cheek, and slowly and carefully he kissed me. It was so soft, unlike the Noah Puckerman everyone seemed to know. He was so gentle, so loving. When he pulled away I reached out for more, and more came and went.  
Our love was not easy.  
Our love opened up old wounds, showed us that our outer cores needed to be broken into.

He told me stories. They were full of detail, sometimes sweet and sometimes bitter. He told me I needed to stop pretending. I needed to quit being a stereotype. I needed to find myself.

So I did. I never liked singing, I was just good at it. Noah could see through my act – he saw that I hated what I did. What I loved, really loved was art. The feeling of holding a brush to a blank canvas and creating something beautiful, that's what I loved. I just never thought I would meet someone there, I never thought I would be able to fit in with that group. They looked and seemed too cool for me, so I tried Glee. I tried something that wasn't me at all, and nobody could tell. Or so I thought.

Now I paint, I sketch. I show my emotions in a way where people can see it all.  
Noah taught me it was okay to be whoever I wanted.  
Fuck the standards, he said.

When I discovered myself I painted Noah, I painted him in the way I saw him. I remember how his eyes lit up and he wrapped his arms around my waist, he kissed my earlobe and whispered: "Thank you, thank you for this and for what you have created yourself to be." I couldn't stop smiling for days.

Now I drink my tea, I photograph the nature in the early mornings. Then I quietly sneak back into my apartment. I remove my clothes and sneakily get back in to bed. I kiss my partner's cheek and we lay there together, remembering the days when we were liars. Now, we're in love. Now, things have changed. They have changed for the better. I have never been happier.


	2. The Woman

An:/Let's see how you guys like this, reviews are welcome.****

Present.  
There is a hand pressed up against my back, tracing lines and poking at my freckles.  
Oh, Noah.  
He's kind of like a little boy, discovering things he never knew.  
This was hard for him, accepting our love; it pulled him apart at first. I hate thinking about it.

I caught him with a woman once.  
It was the most difficult time in our relationship, senior year of high school. Of course nobody knew really, but my real friends could tell. It was the subtle brush against me in the hallway; the mouthed 'call me's, the way he smirked a little when he caught me sketching in my notebook. I loved him then and now too. I like to think that he loved me at that point, but it was so full of issues that I never got to figure it out.  
The woman had dark hair. They were in his bed; she was in my spot, the place I laid when we talked for hours. But, they weren't talking. They were colliding, in a way that I couldn't with Noah.  
I remember screaming.  
Noah's mother still recalls this day when we stop by for Holidays.  
The woman had dark skin; all I remember was the skin. It was against his.  
She was seeing things I never saw. She was in my spot.  
All I know is I screamed.  
I feel like I made up the rest of it, throughout time I probably added bit and pieces. Who really knows?  
The next day I can picture easily. I was asleep, surrounded by papers covered in charcoal. Sketches to release my anger. The charcoal was all over my face and hands, but I fell asleep in the mist of it all. I awoke to him. The smell of Noah but it felt like it wasn't him anymore. As if it couldn't be. I remember his eyes, so dark and lonely. He was crying.  
This was the first time I saw him cry, ever.  
He just shook his head and stared at me, "Why is it so easy for you?" He whispered. "God, I feel like the biggest idiot. Kurt, you're the best thing that's ever happened to me. Okay? I mean that…I fucking mean it. I want you so much. I _need _you. I can't lose you, alright? I just, I'm having a hard time getting used to the fact that this is who I am. It's pathetic, I have needs, and I used that girl for them. Shit, Kurt." He whips his eyes and looks down, not wanting to look at me.  
I sigh lovingly, pulling his chin up.  
"I love you." And then I kissed him, forgetting about the charcoal mess that I was, and indulging in my favorite thing. "But, really, you have needs? Let me…let me try to help."  
Then he really looked at me.  
And suddenly that well-known Puck smirk appeared across his face.

**Present.**  
I lay my head on his bare shoulders while thinking about what has brought us here. He's clueless that my mind is racing, but that's okay. I kiss him softly then leave him sitting, setting up my easel and paints. I look back for his approval and begin to paint him. As I do he hums a song, one that is very familiar, and I hum along. We do this for hours, but I've began to realize that no matter what you do with the person you love, it will always be the best time of your life.


End file.
